And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
