After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
