new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
