We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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