Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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