took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
