Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
