Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
