i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
