Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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