So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
