Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
