just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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