You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
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