I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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