I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
