I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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