love makes seman taste better
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
