i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
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