dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
