I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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