She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
