? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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