Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
