That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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