omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
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