Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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