NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
