Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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