I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
