we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
