Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize
