well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
