i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
