I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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