Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
ttyl tear gas
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
