i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
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