It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Randomize