just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
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