So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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