Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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