check it out our google latitudes are spooning
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
