apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
