Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize