I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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