i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
