Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
