We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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