She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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