he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Found the puke drawer
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
