I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize