I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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